IN CONVERSATION WITH KEHLANI

words by JANA LETONJA

Numéro Netherlands Digital presents 16-time Platinum, 2-time Grammy Award-nominated singer and songwriter Kehlani, as the Cover Star of the day. She made their highly anticipated return with the latest single ‘After Hours’ and released their fourth studio album ‘Crash’ on 21st June.

Kehlani, how would you describe your career journey since its beginning?
Tumultuous, but rewarding and honestly honorable. I think I’ve had a lot of moments where the option to go about it in a way that would betray me existed and I’m just happy I never betrayed myself.

Earlier this year, you released your latest single ‘After Hours’, which marked your highly anticipated return to the music scene. How have these two years off inspired your new music?
More than anything, reflecting on touring inspired my new music. It allowed me to really look at what makes people move and what type of experience we can have in person with each other. And I think that really shifted the music that I’m making.

‘After Hours’ has already, in quite a short time, proven to become a global sensation. How good does that feel, especially after not releasing new music for what is considered quite a long period in the industry?
I’m just grateful. I try not to think of how it reflects outside of me, I try not to think of how it could come off or look. I try to just stay centered and focus the tasks at hand.

You also just released your fourth album ‘Crash’. Tell us more about it, what inspired it and what does it represent for you both personally and as an artist.
For me, this album reflects my freedom, my ability to exist completely and wholly as myself. Being present without explanation or apologies or overly explaining myself, overdoing anything. I think I’m just standing in who I am and not caring if anybody likes it or not. I’m just being me.

What does freedom represent in your life? How good does it feel to have it?
For me, freedom is all the ways in which we break all of the constraints that we’ve applied to ourselves. I think there’s a very large obvious idea of freedom that we understand reflected in the world. Whether it’s like actual, literal freedom and the freeing of these places and these people who are oppressed. And then there’s ways that we have to breakthrough to personal and self-identified freedom from the prisons that we create for ourselves. For me, that was the largest realization how much I’ve kept myself non-free, self-imposed. Once I felt like I broke free from that, it was like I got to hold the reins, I got to be in control of this. I have one time to live and that was the most important lesson I could have ever learned.

What are you most excited about for the journey of promoting the new album this summer?
I’m excited to see people not be able to put me in any kind of box they’ve ever put me in. I have a pretty consistent bet of people not really understanding me and not in a bad way, but I think people have never been able to gauge where I’m at with it. And I almost think it’s a superpower. I think people have expected me to play the game and be completely different than I am. I think they get surprised by my humanity, and are consistently surprised by my identity or my family relationships or my personal relationships. Once I kind of recognized that that wasn’t a bad thing and I put it in the music, I’m seeing that more people relate to it, to not being put in these boxes and relate to just being a lot more unorthodox. 

I’m excited to see everybody and connect with everybody, getting to hear those stories of how they see themselves reflected in my journey and how they feel this story helped their story and things like that. I’m just excited for another level of connection with my fans, honestly.

For your music, you’ve received many accolades, including 2 Grammy nominations. What do you personally perceive as the biggest reward for your work?
Getting to retire my mother. My mom doesn’t have to work anymore and my family has their needs taken care of the best that they can. And my child is healthy and happy and thinks I’m a rockstar. So, I think it doesn’t really get better than human accolades.

Before venturing into music, you aspired to train as a dancer at Juilliard. How did you feel when that dream came to an end, and what role does dance play in your life today?
I was devastated when that dream had to come to an end, but my new dream wouldn’t have birthed and I learned a lot from dance. I learned discipline, I learned that failure is just a state of mind and that there’s many different ways that you can reach a goal. And I learned a lot more from the transition from dancing to singing than just dancing alone. It was a really big, hard thing that had to be worked through. It took a lot of mental strength because I was a kid who essentially watched the dream that I had my whole life change. Mentally, it was more of what does dance do for me now? Of course I’m glad I’m able to move my body, that I can relate to my body in this way and that I feel good in my body, but if anything, it was all the mental things that this switch over taught me.

How did you then go from dance to music? What sparked your passion for music?
I got a knee injury and I couldn’t dance anymore. I needed to take a break, but I was already in art school, so I kind of needed to pick a different focus. I decided to pick singing and it took a lot of breaking out of a shell because you’re silent when you’re a dancer. You speak with your body, so it took a lot for me to even find my voice.

How do music and dance compare as art mediums in your opinion?
I think there are a lot of mediums that are different, depending on how you communicate. But they’re all communicative. I think learning how to communicate feelings and thoughts through your body is such a visceral experience. It is different than people reading words and knowing what you mean immediately. You have to express it, and I feel the same way about visual art.

Having a young daughter, how do you make sure to maintain the perfect balance between your family life and career?
The first thing is understanding that the restraints that have been put on mothers and the expectations that have been put on mothers are super patriarchal from the jump, this expectation that mothers can’t be the breadwinners and mothers can’t work and have children, or a mother is a bad mom for how much she works. I think that those constraints have to be lifted first. There’s so much grace and compassion that one has to have for themselves to break down the internal self implied prison of am I a good mom? I’m a fantastic mother and I include my daughter in almost everything that I do that is appropriate for her to be included in. And she loves me for it. She thinks I’m the coolest, she thinks I’m a rock star, and that’s the most important person to think I’m a rock star of anybody in this life. I’m just grateful that she has so much grace and so much understanding of my hard work and appreciates every little bit that I put into it. There is no perfect balance, it’s just the balance that works for you.

Besides promoting the new album and new music, what is coming up next for you? Are you planning any tour, or already working on new music?
I’m definitely doing both. Touring is the epicenter of my career, it’s what I do. I’ve always been a tour focused artist and that’s really where I feel like I shine and where I feel like I have the most fun simultaneously. I’m really excited for that.

What can the fans expect from the tour? 
It’s just going to be so fun. I made this album specifically for this tour.

talent KEHLANI
creative director & photographer TYLER PATRICK KENNY
styling MARC ERAM
production assistant ASHLEY VANDERLAAN
styling assistant LAUREN GRAY
video/lighting MEECH
hair DHAIRIUS THOMAS
makeup TROYE ANTONIO
vehicles @larry_cartigan @scott_dylyn @cartiganstreetrockets
editor TIMI LETONJA
cover design ARTHUR ROELOFFZEN
special thanks to DARIA for the great space, and TATYANA, COURTNI and CARA